1034

My mind is a blur, my soul is intact.
It's been crazy but I know where I'm at.
I'm at that point where the goal is to be whoever I want to be.
Because life is rather dull when it's routine.

I sound vague but I have my reasons.
Sharing would be unveiling things that are not ready.
I'm happy and sad all at the same time.
The complexity of this madness has been there the whole while.

I can suppress it, ignore it and down right deny it.
But this hysteria has been there the whole time.
When you love someone you push all that aside.
So it's been a good year but it's time for me to be more in tuned.

But nonetheless, I will always love you.

0432

This month of the death of us,
The month of the life of us.

I feel so alive,
I am guilty.

I feel crazy and it is swell.

x

0416

I think someone should invent a greeting for people who don't sleep till dawn cause you see "good morning" doesn't really make sense because it's something you say after sleep and it's a little too late for "good evening" and "good night" is definitely out of the question cause it sounds like you are bidding them farewell as someone drifts off into a sleepy slumber. So I guess "hello" would be good. Whoever invented the word hello is brilliant, it's form, shape, structure the way it sounds is perfect and you never get sick of how it looks and it masks the identity of whoever that uses it. Unlike say..."hey" that just sounds really youthful. hello is good. I like hello. I also like a couple of songs with it's presence.

Life is strange, as cliche as it sounds. I found myself in a situation I would have never imagined myself to be at today. You know how people always say that everyone is just trying to find "themselves" , what if you are everything. I mean cause the word self sounds like a singular entity. What if you don't have a particular self? I'm very happy with not knowing who I am. Life's pretty boring when you have certainty in this aspect. I've been doing very strange things recently and I've been giving everything a chance. It makes me all scared at the same time but suddenly I find beauty in so many things. I'm so in love with this self-proclaimed secret life that I have. But if you ask me what I'm doing, I'd tell you and it won't be a secret anymore but who cares! Nothing in this world was ever mine to begin not even my mind so there is no loss in sharing.  I'm in the process of figuring what it is exactly that compels me to certain things that I will not speak of here because I feel like it is so great that when I speak of it, I'd be showing off! And all I want to do now is, be humble, brave and a cat.

Meow also mean G'bye in Cat!

X

0329

Photos by Chris Chan

Busy Busy Busy

Bee Bee Bee

1022

It's 1022 and I'm still in school editing a video for class tomorrow. good god!

Perfect

You gave me hyacinths first a year ago;"

"They called me the hyacinth girl."

--Yet when we came back, late, from the hyacinth garden,

Your arms full, and your hair wet, I could not

Speak, and my eyes failed, I was neither

Living nor dead, and I knew nothing,

Looking into the heart of light, the silence.

0127

How broken is my heart,